artist exhibited his paintings in the gallery.After the show he asked the owner of the gallery:
- tell how many people were interested in my paintings?He wanted somebody to buy them?
- yes ..!One man was very interested!He asked how much will cost the web after your death, whether they rise in price.I replied that I certainly rise, and then he bought 20 paintings.
- How cool!And who is this gentleman?- Asks the artist.
- Yes, it is the doctor who treats you.- It meets gallery owner.
lovers of beautiful
Cavalier lady accompanies the exhibition of modern art paintings.The lady looks with admiration, the gentleman yawning.Suddenly he perked up and say:
- Look dear, look how cute two unpretentious realistic silhouette against the background of abstractions and incomprehensible plots piling up!
- Please, keep your voice down!- Whispers the lady - It's signs on the toilet door.
New Russian decided to join the art.Buying a painting, the artist's avant-g
- And why your pictures do not understand what is drawn?
- And I see the world - the artist responsible.
- In a pancake!A Th is not wearing glasses?
The seller paintings Russian decided to purchase a new work by Rembrandt.Before you pay the money, he asked:
- Is there a guarantee that the picture is authentic?
- Of course, three-year warranty - the seller is responsible.
artist specializing in abstractionism to share with a colleague:
- Imagine a customer asked to change his eye color portrait, I got involved ...
- What's the problem?Take so changed - Bar Council.
- Yes, you know, I do not remember where in the eye painted.
New Russian pontovatsya decided by each other.One says:
- You know, yesterday I bought the original Malevich - "Black Square".
- Oh!It can not be, I'm just a month ago at an auction script Malevich's "Black Square" has acquired.
- And you have a Malevich?
- Victor Malevich.
- And ... it is clear, and I Michael!
Oh, these new Russian ...
Strolling through the gallery, the new Russian decides to get a picture and asks:
- who drew this picture?
- Oh ... this picture of Peter Powell Rubens, Flemish school ...
- Well, no shit myself!So much for bubble scribble of a student ?!
- you drew this picture?
- Yes, that's my job.
- And how much?
- 10 thousand. Dollars.
- Those guys themselves!You'd think you died 300 years ago!
careful Picasso Picasso ...
invited guests at his exhibition.Featuring the work, he says:
- That's my picture, but here I painted my wife.
One lady asked anxiously:
- I hope you do not have kids?
Here's how to paint!
to his country house Picasso decided to order the furniture of mahogany.
to quickly explain the master what he wants, Picasso sketched a sketch, and asked:
- How much will this furniture?
- Not at all, just sign sketch.
understand the art is not difficult!
- Oh, this is contemporary art, I do not understand him.
- Yes, it's very simple.If you can go around the job - then it's a sculpture.And if the work on the wall, then - a picture.
laugh at their masters and judges, and now laugh about what children say.
And you can share anecdotes about the artists?